What am I talking about? None other than TRAINING!!! As you have seen from my Dubai 2014 and Dubai 2015 (well, somewhat for 2015), I put a LOT of time and effort into training for these events, which is now the Boston Marathon. After my 2014 summer of engorging, come October I was full fledge ahead to lose all that added weight and get back into shape. Back came the diet and exercising most days of the week. So marathon comes along, and by all means it went fine for what it was. Then 2 weeks later was RAK 1/2 marathon. Again, last year I got one of my best times and this year was a bit ?? on how it would go. Don't feel as lean as last year, but all things considered, felt fit, was well rested, was good about all my nutrition and sleep, and really had NO excuses to NOT have a good race. So I ended up doing a 1:48:08. Not a shabby time, BUT my slowest time since being in Dubai AND ... just had one of those "bad" races. I remember starting off okay till about 8-9km. And now that I am running with a watch, every km it beeps with your pace. So I saw and was well aware that I was a smidge slowing down the coming km, but fair enough, felt "on pace." Then I remember at 11km I just got bored, slowed down some more, and just couldn't pick it up again. And actually, just wanted to stop! Not because I was hurting or in pain, but just was thinking exactly that, "I just want to stop." I remember sighing and thinking I was just over the 1/2-way point and just finish the darn thing and have it be done with. I really would have let go BUT I still had a wee bit of competitive spirit because one of my running companions was just right behind me and we went back and forth for awhile and technically I should have been waaaaay ahead of her, so I didn't want to let go too much and have her pass me, then I would REALLY have been disappointed. Around 14-15km, maybe even earlier, I was starting to feel REALLY hot and thirsty and a little crampy sensations in my calves... which I remember from the marathon was because of dehydration. So I grabbed a bottle and sipped as I ran, but again, just felt really HOT (and of course then hitting myself I didn't wear my compression socks as I normally do in races to avoid these calf niggles, but then again, people say it is more psychological). So as everyone powered through the last km to the finish line, I just steady eased into it because mentally I was just "eh, just want to finish this stupid thing." NOT the right attitude!!! When I crossed was just thinking that I found that waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more difficult than it should have been and already was in a bad mood about it. My watch said 1:47:56 so I thought "at least I went under 1:48" which is actually ALL the times I used to get back in Chicago but feel I am in MUCH better shape now, so when I got my actual time, it was just the icing on the cake what a crap race I had. Sigh.
So one "good" news is that saw a bunch of my runner friends mingling around and it seemed that a lot of people were grumbling about the slower times and then the heat and I wasn't the only ones. Even the elites all went a fair amount slower (for them that means a minute!) than last year. Even though I tried to console myself with heat being the issue, which later I found out it WAS in fact 90 degrees F and more humid than usual, I was still beating myself up how I lost my zest and mojo to push it during the race. But really, during the race just felt like not bothering and kind of didn't care. GASP?!?! Very strange for me. There were of course friends that DID get their best times, so although happy for them (I was!), I was just disappointed it wasn't me (although really don't know if I could have topped by 1:44:56 from last year. I went over 3 minutes slower!).
I came home after the race and honestly just felt depressed (I'm over it now of course). Which is VERY unusual for me. Tried to sit and think, "where did I go wrong?" And then I couldn't see anything physically wrong with me and then blamed it that I somehow seemed to have lost my mental edge. I myself ALWAYS say "running is mostly mental" and prided myself on my strong mental attitude to keep going and motivating myself..... Especially during races. Last year I was strong as a horse mentally. This race (and year!) I feel I've lost it. Is it because "my season" is so long? Usually this time I'm already on my vacation mode (meaning not nazi training). Then I went to consult with all my running friends from Dubai and from Chicago, and bless them, they made me feel better saying ALL the times at RAK were slower (even the elites, blah blah) and, which is true, we ALL have bad races and pretty much, suck it up and move forward. Then one of my friends said, "maybe you are just burned out, you have been non-stop since October and maybe take a week or two off." Right away I gasped and immediately was thinking, "OMG! Take time off?!!!" But then when I thought about it, I thought she may be right!!!! The funny part was that as soon as THAT got into my head about taking time off, NOT waking up at 4:45am to run, sleeping in a bit, having an evening or two free, my mood and attitude suddenly changed and I didn't beat myself up about my crappy run. AND the timing couldn't have been better because ATP Tennis is coming up.
Well, again, somehow I have a "lucky star" over me because then a bunch of stuff happened that I was glad I decided to take this break. One is that I got a mini cold!!! I haven't gotten sick in AGES! More of a throat dry cough and no body aches or anything. But did make me feel tired. So that was "good timing" (funny to say that). THEN I had 2 "surprise" guests that just happen to whiz through town. One was my mom's friends husbands nephew (really), so had the obligatory Dubai Mall dinner and fountain show. The other was a friends friend that pretty much was invited to stay at my place through this friend (hmph). I was going to say NYET, but then guilty conscious came over and my good travel karma and it is things like this that gives me good travel karma. And I have been that random friends friend to others that have hosted, so did host him for a couple of nights. It all worked out and it didn't inconvenience me too much AND being from San Fran he is in IT so my kind host repayment was him helping me with my silly computer questions, so it all worked out. But obviously stayed up later than usual entertaining, so was able to do that and not be a bad host by going to bed before 10pm.
THEN... yes one more reason why "taking a break" has come at the perfect time, is that ATP Tennis is this week and I DO want to relax and enjoy it! This is a week of a lifetime and just felt it was time to be more social and have a bit more fun (and not being anxious about training, etc).
Soooo, now I am spoiling my diet and don't care AND am still doing some training stuffs (hehe, can't give it up completely!), but a lot more relaxed. Come this last weekend in Feb all through March and into the marathon it is going to be hard care and I KNOW now when I set my mind to it, I will be motivated and inspired, so I think this time off will bring me that!!!
This has been a good lesson for me, it's okay to take break! I KNOW I would burnout if I continue the way have been.
On another note, I ran a 31km (about 19ish miles), 3 Emirates Run. Yes, I know this is me "taking a break" but it was FUN run where you would get "disqualified if you run fast and if you don't stop for pictures." Haha. Again, this slow pace should have felt easier, but I'm not beating myself up about it, especially that I was just getting over a cold AND it was a cusp of a sandstorm.
Here are some pics (I'm with the sunglasses, it was dusty!):
See? Me doing my stretches!!!
BTW, this is a physio's nightmare pics, I am HOPING (praying actually) that my belt was not level on my waist because this is what I wold call "THE WORST RUNNING POSTURE EVER!" Major hip drop on my Left and then shoulder elevation on the L as well. Gasp! I almost had a heart attack when I saw it! Sent it to my physio colleague and we were both thinking, "umm... you have a LOT of work to do!" - strengthen my hips and butt (and postural muscles)!
Anyway, forewarning - my next blogs before Boston probably solely will be running related, I forgive in advance!
